"This has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way"

I obtained my visa with no hang-ups, I was able to leave Morehead City with no hitches... Everyone talks about how much they will miss me, etc. It's nice that people like me enough to miss me, but it also makes me feel bad to hear them say it. Yes, I will miss them too, but I am eager to leave. This is not the end of my summer. It is prelude to a new adventure. I have mixed emotions of excitement, joy, bliss, anxiety, and nostalgia.

My departure is TEN DAYS AWAY!!! I can only hope that while I am away from the Americas, everyone I love and care for will do great things for themselves.

I plan to write again soon.

time to jump...er, prepare to jump...

I leave Morehead City in three days. I plan to spend time with my brother and parents before I leave in less than fifteen days. Tonight, I decided to drink some brandy and pay attention to my blog (sort of).

Everyone asks me if I am super-excited about my trip...or if everything is 'surreal' to me right now. Yes, I am excited- but it is the kind of excitement that come in 'waves.' I don't know if that makes sense, but I am so happy to go somewhere new, yet I realize that I have NO IDEA what I am in for. I am on edge, hoping that everything will work out. That says it all.

Put yourself in my shoes- imagine moving to a city with over 12,000,000 people and signs that don't even used romanized letters. Well, it's not all that serious. I will be laughing at myself for most of the way anyway.

here today

Working more, drinking less. Learning more, writing more. Finding new sources of inspiration and looking forward to change.

I am writing music again...finally.

here is one...it is a country ditty:

I'm here today,

gone tomorrow.

I hope you don't miss me too much.

I'm here today like a bandit on the spot,

but I'll soon be gone like a vanishing thought.

I'm here today,

gone tomorrow.

Please take care while I'm away.

I'm here now like a man in the spotlight,

but I'm leaving soon like a sparrow in flight.

I'm here today

but I'm leaving soon

I hope you don't miss me too much.

OK! I have been too busy living to write about living, but I needed to publish something for myself! That's all for now.

Remain in Light

It's slightly overcast now...the clouds will likely obscure the sun for the next hour or so. While I love all the light and vitamin D the sun provides down here, I also enjoy these natural little breaks that quickly moving flocks of clouds afford. That is how life is here. Things are laid-back as ever this week; at times work is hot and intense and just plain aggravating, like the sun in your eyes or searing your skin. Then come the welcome breaks from that intensity. Though these breaks are often anything but productive(the don't offer vitamin D or monetary reward) , they come at a natural pace and give me time to play just as hard as I work.

Summer life is as sweet as a vine-ripened heirloom tomato.

Will buy my plane ticket soon...then it is 'on' for sure.

"Alot of Movin'"

So...there are less than two months left before my hiatus from the western world. I received an e-mail from Thammasat U. saying that an official acceptance letter from the University will soon arrive- so the program is still on.

I am in Carteret County. This place feels so much like home, but it can be equally backward and ugly at the same time. I do love the bike-ride to work, however. Onto the boardwalk, under the big branch, always on my own, across the marsh that is low tide half the time.

My aging grandmother was in a car accident a few days ago. Things are not good; several bones are broken and the threat of pneumonia is always there for an injured elderly person. For me, the idea of my grandmother dying is so sad that it isn't really something I'm able to process. Prayer and thought are the only things I have that can help any of this..so I keep praying and thinking good thoughts.

random observations

I was working this past Monday, and talking to co-workers about random topics- most of them humorous, as many of the conversations in a kitchen tend to be. We somehow got on the topic of 'crack' and 'crack heads.' My co-worker said that his eight year old daughter was asking him what crack was, how it was made, and why people did it. I snickered at the absurdity of that type of question coming out of an eight year old's mouth. I probably found it funny because I thought to myself "how does a child that young even hear the term 'crack head,' unless they actively read the paper or watch the news?" I almost instantly regretted my reaction when I learned that this little girl was trying to understand why her mother was addicted to crack cocaine. I felt like an ass.

One of my neighbors receives much of his money from family owned hog farms here in Eastern North Carolina. He said that no one working in the hog farming industry believes that the animals are treated humanely, but it is the only real money maker for most farmers, especially after "they took the tobacco away." He said that the stench one smells when on a 'hog factory' (or down wind of it) is "the smell of money."

I know these are depressing- or rather disturbing pieces of information, but I think that they are important observations, however random they may be. This is Eastern North Carolina Culture.

Looks like I was awarded 750 dollars (THANKYOU MR. AND MRS. RIVERS!) towards my upcoming Thai adventure. I'm assuming the program is still 'on.' I'm still looking forward to spending time in Bangkok. The political situation there is interesting. The 'red shirts' claim to be- and likely are- Thailand's poor and disadvantaged. The well-publicized sex trade in Thailand points toward the victimization of many Thai people of low socio-economic standing. The funny thing about the 'red shirts' is that the leader they previously supported is quite corrupt and has several nasty skeletons in his own closet.

I understand that politics are taken seriously in Thailand. It important to understand that the country is a constitutional monarchy and there is zero tolerance regarding disrespect of their majesties, the King and Queen of Thailand. I am sure, however, that no one is really reading this (AT ALL), so I hope I don't say anything that could be misinterpreted, ever possibly read by authorities, and thus get me in trouble.

OK, social engagements and a waning wireless Internet connection have me running short on time. I had some great human interactions this weekend and the following Monday. Kindness still emanates from everything around me...for the most part- Sunday afternoon was the exception. Something was wrong. I don't have the same anxious feeling anymore, so I hope nothing is amiss.